Summer’s arrival often brings relief for busy families. There is no need to rise before dawn, pack lunches the night before, or make sure everyone has a clean shirt ready for school. Amid looser routines and later bedtimes, however, lies an incredible opportunity for learning.
Not math. Not language arts. By summer, even teachers are ready for a break from those subjects.
Instead, focus on character-building through the “7 Cs” of resilience: competence, confidence, connection, character, contribution, coping, and control.
The beauty of building resilience during the summer is that children are not simultaneously juggling grades, school expectations, and packed schedules. Better yet, these lessons can be woven naturally into everyday family life without expensive camps, special programs, or added pressure.
You do not need to tackle all seven traits at once. Simply look for opportunities to build them into daily experiences.
Competence
Competence is having the skills and knowledge to do something successfully.
One of the best ways to build competence is through life skills. Children develop competence through practice, not perfection. Start small and gradually add responsibility.
Ideas include:
- Packing a suitcase
- Cooking simple meals
- Planning a family outing
- Managing their schedule for a day
Confidence
Confidence is the belief that you can succeed.
It grows when children face challenges, whether they succeed immediately or not. While parents often want to step in, allowing children to work through difficulties helps build lasting confidence.
Try:
- A new sport
- Ordering at a restaurant
- Speaking with unfamiliar adults in appropriate settings
- Learning a new hobby
Connection
Connection is the feeling of belonging and knowing others care.
Strong relationships provide support and security. Summer offers valuable opportunities to strengthen those bonds.
Consider:
- Device-free family meals
- One-on-one time with relatives
- Family traditions
- Shared activities with friends
Character
Character includes honesty, responsibility, fairness, and kindness.
Talk about your family’s values in natural ways, and model the behaviors you hope to see. Children learn as much from what we do as what we say.
Examples include:
- Returning a lost item
- Apologizing after a conflict
- Completing an unpleasant chore
- Treating others respectfully
Contribution
Contribution is the feeling of being useful and valued.
Children benefit from opportunities to make meaningful contributions. Summer’s flexible schedule often creates more room for genuine responsibility.
Ideas include:
- Helping prepare meals
- Caring for pets or plants
- Assisting neighbors or grandparents
- Volunteering in the community
Coping
Coping is the belief that you can handle difficult emotions and situations.
Our job is not to eliminate every struggle. It is to help children navigate challenges in healthy ways.
Summer provides plenty of opportunities, including boredom, canceled plans, sibling disagreements, and disappointment. Rather than solving every problem, guide children as they develop solutions.
Helpful responses include:
- “That sounds frustrating. What could help right now?”
- “Would you rather talk about it or take a break first?”
- “What usually helps when you feel this way?”
- “I have an idea, but first, what are three solutions you can think of?”
Control
Control is the feeling that you have influence over your life.
Children who have age-appropriate opportunities to make decisions often become stronger problem-solvers. Offer choices within reasonable limits so they can practice ownership and responsibility.
Examples include:
- Choosing activities from approved options
- Managing parts of their schedule
- Setting personal goals
- Deciding how to spend free time
Summer does not need to become another parenting project. Some days you will intentionally focus on these skills. Other days you will simply enjoy the season.
Resilience is not built through perfection. It grows through consistent opportunities to learn, adapt, and try again. If you create even a few moments this summer that strengthen competence, confidence, connection, character, contribution, coping, or control, you are helping your child develop skills that will last long after summer ends.
And that may be one of the most valuable lessons of all.
Alison Bogle is a writer living in Austin with her husband and three children. A former fourth grade teacher, she now enjoys writing about children and education. You can also catch her talking about articles from Austin Family magazine each Thursday morning on FOX 7 Austin.
