During the early days of my parenting journey, working from home was a blessing and a curse. I was grateful to continue my career while staying at home with my son, but I missed being able to connect with other adults. Being new to Austin didn’t help either, as my proverbial “village” was over 1,000 miles away.
Without local friends to turn to, life felt isolating. So, I made it my mission to seek out other moms and create my own community. It took some time, but here are five ways I learned how to make mom friends in Austin.
1.
MOMS Groups
Many Austin area churches have groups expressly set up for mothers. My church in South Austin has a program called MOMS. Other churches have MOPS or ROMP groups. No matter the acronym, the concept is the same: a gathering place for moms to connect with other moms and receive some free childcare for a few hours. The beauty of these groups is that you can connect with mothers who are in different stages of their parenting journey, allowing you to commiserate with those in the trenches of the early years and receive support, knowledge and tips from those who have older children.
Moms can utilize the childcare on-site or bring their little ones to meetings, alleviating the burden of childcare logistics. And if you aren’t a parishioner of that church, don’t sweat it. These MOMS groups don’t require it.
2.
Recently my family and I moved to a new neighborhood where we didn’t know anyone. After a bit of sleuthing, I found a Facebook page specifically for parents in the neighborhood. While it wasn’t an active group, I created a post saying: I would love to meet other parents of similarly aged children so my son could make friends in the neighborhood. I figured that would go over better than “Anyone want to be friends?!” Crickets. Thankfully, I’m not one to take rejection to heart.
A week later, I received messages from a neighbor down the street inviting us to dinner and another message inviting us to the local splash pad from someone a few streets away. Since then, I’ve gotten to know other moms in the area, been added to the monthly Bunco group and have the inside scoop on the latest events in the neighborhood.
Facebook can still be a very useful tool for moms to find new friends.
3.
Exchange Numbers
Even if your children aren’t in school, there is a good chance they attend some type of activity, leading you to see the same parents every week. From library time to swim classes to gymnastics, most activities for little ones involve parent participation or at least oversight. And kiddos are an excellent conversation icebreaker, opening the door to actual adult conversation, however short-lived it may be.
After a few classes, ask to exchange numbers with the parents you connect with most. A simple invitation for a playdate is an easy way to swap numbers with other moms and I’ve never had anyone say no.
If you’re craving community with other moms, there’s a high chance that others are too.
4.
Buy Nothing Groups
Not only are Buy Nothing groups great for receiving free items and finding homes for your no-longer-needed goods, but they are also wonderful platforms for forming friendships.
I found myself regularly giving and receiving clothing for my son from the same few people in our group. It made sense, given that our kids were all around the same age. As our kiddos grew, so did our conversations over Messenger. Soon, we were swapping parenting stories and getting to know each other outside of exchanging hand-me-downs.
Since the physical boundaries of the Buy Nothing groups are generally small, it’s easy to connect in “real life” by walking down the street or meeting at the local park.
5.
Join Non-Mom MeetUps
Yes, children take up a lot of your time, especially when they are babies and toddlers, but if you can have someone watch your child for a few hours once a month, try attending a “non-mom” meetup.
Find a meetup that aligns with your interests and passions. Sometimes you need a break from parenting talk. I’ve joined book clubs, writing groups and sports meetups, and I love meeting people with similar interests. If you are a creative person, Austin has a fantastic group called “Creative Ladies Night.” It meets once a month at a female-owned business. Drinks, snacks and inspiration for your artistic endeavors are all provided.
Inevitably, every group I’ve joined includes other mothers, but there isn’t the expectation to talk about your children, as there is with groups specifically geared towards parents. Even better, a built-in bond already exists as the group is based on a shared interest, making conversation much easier since you know you have at least one thing in common.
Parenthood can be an overwhelming and sometimes isolating journey. As moms, many of us crave connection.
Take the first step and see what friendships are around the corner.
Laura Palmer is a freelance writer, mom and wife working on her first children’s book. She can be found at laurathewriter.com