Q
My husband and I have three young children. My parents have asked me to host a meal for our extended family. Organizing a dinner like that feels overwhelming. What would be the value of doing this, when everyone, kids included, is addicted to screens?
Is aiming for a traditional Norman Rockwell holiday dinner too ambitious in today’s world?
A
Large family dinners remain an important and cherished tradition for many households, and they continue to thrive because they offer something that screens and busy schedules cannot. These gatherings provide a rare opportunity to slow down, connect, and create shared memories with the people who matter most. The value goes far beyond the meal on the table. It lives in the stories that resurface, the laughter that fills the room, and the sense of belonging that strengthens with every gathering.
Planning a holiday dinner can indeed feel daunting, but the key to making it manageable is delegation. Invite guests to contribute by bringing a dish or taking charge of a category such as meats, salads, desserts, or sides. When family members participate, they feel invested in the celebration, and the workload becomes far lighter. Involving your children can be both practical and meaningful. Young children often take pride in helping set the table, arranging napkins, or assisting with a simple family recipe. Teaching them how to make a favorite cookie or a traditional holiday dish connects them to their heritage and helps them appreciate the work that goes into creating a festive meal.
To shift the focus away from screens, introduce simple activities that encourage conversation across generations. Communication games can spark curiosity and laughter, making it easier for quieter guests or young children to participate. Options like ChitChat, Family Talking Points, or Do You Really Know Your Family? can help break the ice. You can also ask attendees to bring their favorite game to share, ensuring everyone feels included.
The deeper value of a holiday dinner emerges in the moments when children learn how to greet relatives, pass dishes around the table, and listen to family stories. These experiences help them understand where they come from and how they fit into a larger family circle. The bonds formed during these gatherings often last long after the decorations are packed away.
Hosting a traditional holiday dinner is not too ambitious. With thoughtful planning, shared responsibilities, and a spirit of togetherness, you can create a celebration that blends tradition with modern life. The result may not be a perfect Norman Rockwell scene, but it can be a warm, memorable moment your family will treasure for years.
Betty Richardson, PhD, RN, CS, LPC, LMFT, is an Austin-based psychotherapist.
