I Hate January

I Hate January

As much as I love the holidays, I loathe January with equal fervor. Some months remind you of colors. January is the color of baby poo. Its very existence birthed the shade of ochre. Not everyone gets an official holiday in January. The shortest month of the year has...
Sweaty Christmas

Sweaty Christmas

Years ago, I wrote a book for kids called “Sweaty Christmas.” It’s hard to believe, but that white heat of genius did not change the face of modern publishing. (Oh, if I had a nickel!) It does remain, to date, my favorite attempt at children’s literature. Anyhoo. The...
Happy Turkeys

Happy Turkeys

Every Thanksgiving we point our headlights west. Leaving chic espresso shops behind, we speed past deserted gas stations and miles of empty scrub brush, barreling down open highways to finally arrive at Turkey Roost Ranch. It’s our family’s land. My mother’s people...
Planet Denial

Planet Denial

  Fun fact. When Texans move back home after living abroad (abroad meaning anywhere but Texas), we often forget our main reason for leaving: the heat. When I moved back, lo 20+ years ago, I, too, had forgotten. So in early September, my boss attempted to comfort...
Queen of the Babysitters

Queen of the Babysitters

  I was eleven years old and ready for adulthood when I took my first babysitting gig. Bring on the money, solo TV watching and being home alone (with Baby Hector, of course). “Help yourself to whatever you like!” Mrs. Carmichael said, waving her hand around the...
Pick Your Weird

Pick Your Weird

In college, my pal, Martha, embarked on six weeks of The Red Diet. She ate only red and white foods, while red lights flashed on her tummy and drumming music blasted through the stereo. We chuckled watching her gobble up sirloin steaks (red meat), vanilla ice cream...
Look Up!

Look Up!

Yesterday, as I sat on Mopac, fuming, as one does in Mopac traffic, I spied the Frost Bank Tower. It’s now overshadowed by the higher, hipper skyscrapers, of course, but I remembered the balks and groans during its construction. “Have you viewed the monstrosity? You...
Dad Makeovers

Dad Makeovers

I used to stroll around Target with two babies born thirteen months apart. What mom doesn’t kill a day with air-conditioned zombie-walking, mainlining Starbucks like a boss?  I’d pass the little boy’s department, well-stocked with graphic tees. My eldest was a serial...
First Mother’s Day

First Mother’s Day

“People should know,” the therapist said, “parenting is not gratifying.” I released an awkward “HA!” Did he just say that? Out loud? New mothers really shouldn’t hear this. Or any mother, rookie or veteran. The proclamation was irresponsible. (And thrilling.) And...
You Can Do Dinner

You Can Do Dinner

You’ve made it to the grocery store. Start in the produce section with the endless plastic bag hoo-ha before hitting canned goods. Don’t use up your reserves. You’ve a long journey. Next up, heavy lifting in aisle thirteen. My troop bathes in red sauce, apparently,...
We Always Have Sea World

We Always Have Sea World

I love to travel more than anyone in Austin. It’s a bold statement but I’m resolute. For our honeymoon twenty years ago, my husband and I splurged and flew to Italy. We spent two weeks romping around Florence, Tuscany and the Amalfi Coast. Our travel agent (remember...
Team Dishwasher

Team Dishwasher

We are a mostly “individual sport” type of family. Drawing, Spotify-listening, solo excavations into our own imaginations — that sort of thing. But I do long for moments of us working as a team. There was the sharing of the remote that one movie night. I don’t...
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