As a child, my holidays were a red and green blur of pure, unadulterated joy. As a young adult, I spent my holidays fielding questions about hairstyles and love interests. As a married adult, the holidays meant declaring a side of the family to spend Christmas Day with (thus enduring a year of angry eyes from the forsaken grandmother) and fielding questions about when I’d finally start having kids.

Now that I have kids, it’s a whole new ballgame. Sure, I want my holidays to look like a real-life Hallmark movie, but we all know that’s a sham. Here are my tips for making it through the most wonderful time of the year:

  1. Take the DIY approach with Christmas cards. Choose a favorite photo of yourself and let your kids draw in themselves and your spouse.
  2. Got a picky eater? Bust out the blender and flex your smoothie making skills. (I hear you can add kale to these.) You’ll need it after a steady stream of holiday meals in which your child only eats the rolls.
  3. For the stubborn baby who won’t go to sleep, give him a candy cane and then a Kleenex for clean-up. You can thank my grandfather for that one.
  4. Steel yourself for the moment when your kids dismissively toss aside the present you visited four stores to find because it was sold out online. (Also: don’t shop the week before Christmas.)
  5. Visualize your perfect holiday gathering, activity, photo shoot, etc. — but add tears, a few thrown punches and a blowout diaper. This way, you won’t be disappointed.

At the end of the day, cut yourself and your family some slack. And next year, book an escape to a sandy beach in the Caribbean.

Carrie Taylor is a freelance writer, editor and mother of two boys.

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